When I think of my friends, colleagues, and family, I do
communicate differently with them all. I communicate with each one of them differently
because I know them and they know me differently. For instance, I am most
comfortable around my family members because they have known me and I have been
around them ever since I was born. Some of my colleagues I just met this year,
so I am more reserved around them, at least until I get to know them more on a
personal level. When I am around my friends, we talk about things that I don’t
talk about with my family or my colleagues. After reading all of the learning
resources throughout this course, I have come to realize at least three
strategies that help me communicate effectively.
(1) Always
remember the context that you are in.
Context where we are and who we are around in any given situation. When we
think of context, we should think of in a few different aspects such as
language, relational, situational, and cultural (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2012).
For instance, I wouldn’t talk about a party I went to with my grandma because
we don’t have that type of relationship or I wouldn’t be discussing plans for
my wedding at a funeral because it wouldn’t be the correct situation to discuss
that in.
(2) Have
the ability to take on different perspectives. No one wants to communicate with
someone who only sees their own view on issues. When communicating with
someone, look at things from their side of the conversation. Everything doesn’t
always have to be about you. In other words, be other-oriented, focus on others
other than yourself (Beebe & Redmond, 2011).
(3) Be
mindful of whoever you are talking to (Beebe & Redmond, 2011). In doing
this, I am aware of what I am doing, thinking, and what I am sensing from
others. I make some kind of connection this way. For instance, sensing that someone
doesn’t like politics gives me insight to not discuss those types of matters
unless absolutely required.
Resources
Beebe,
S. A., Beebe, S. J., & Redmond, M. V. (2011). Interpersonal
communication: Relating to others (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon.
O'Hair,
D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication. New York: Bedford/St.
Martin's
Hi Arica, you are right it is important to have distinctive boundaries when communicating with our friends, family, and colleagues. When the boundaries are cross, the relationship can change and not be as effective.
ReplyDeleteThanks for Sharing!
Andrea
Hi Arica:
ReplyDeleteAll three of your strategies are great. I like your first one and the examples you used; they made me chuckle lol. But you are right. I know that I cannot tell everyone everything just for the simple fact, they will not always understand or may even get offend by something I said. Context is so important to keep in mind. I know when I worked at different places, there were only certain co-workers I could talk to about certain things. But those same things I could not tell my boss, otherwise I probably would have gotten fired lol. But it's the truth. So again, context is very important to keep in mind. Thanks for being that to the light!
Arica,
ReplyDeleteI love your strategies for better communication and I also communicate in a similar fashion when it comes to feeling more comfortable around family. It is interesting that when we first meet someone they may seem reserved, but after a while they will start opening up! My personality is very open with almost everyone, I have had to learn you have to be more reserved in certain situations. I enjoyed reading your post, thanks for sharing!
Hi Arica!
ReplyDeleteI agree with you that being other-orientated is essential in developing effective communication. It's essential for one to have an ability to acknowledge and understand other's perspectives in the same respect that they would want others to acknowledge and understand their perspective. Effective communication has its foundation in effective listening as well as acknowledgment and respect of diverse perspectives.